Year End Review

As I look back on this year, I shake my head. Much has happened. I am in disbelief. Where did the time go? It seems just like yesterday I was posing for the camera with my nieces on Christmas Eve 2007. In what seems like a blink of an eye, one year has pasted.

Little did I know what the Lord had in store for me. I had no idea that I would become the fiancé of an amazing man this year. I would have never guessed I’d be making plans to move to the grand state of Texas. How did it all happen?

Phil and I often ask each other the question, “How did we get here,” in an awe like tone of how the Lord has worked in our lives this year. How did we get here? One day at a time, I guess. During those one day at a time moments in life, I laughed, I cried, I learned, and walked away with a cup overflowing more than ever before.

Here are some random things (in random order) that I learned in those one day at a time moments this year:

-Palm Trees in February cure the winter blues.
-There is ACTUALLY a Cubs player named, Fukudome. It’s not a joke or something inappropriate the crowd is yelling at the other team.
-Falling in Love when you least expect it, is out of control and well worth it
-Falling on ice can be prevented by wearing shoes without heels
-Falling while wearing tennis shoes can be prevented by watching where you walk
-Orange Julius Milkshakes can be used to change your life in an instant
-God hears our prayers…especially the ones we have prayed year after year.
-Phil’s movie nights are the best nights
-“Hot Cross Buns” has nothing to do with hot dogs (It took me 28 years to realize this)
-True friends are not something I take for granted
-Jail time in Ethiopia isn’t really all that bad. (Mom & Dad..it’s ok to laugh at this one)
-Dinner of Pepto Bismol and white rice was one of the best meals this year.
-Opportunities to serve are opportunities of a lifetime
-Surprise birthday brownies with a candle are the sweetest thing
-Black Currant Fanta is by far the best kind of soft drink ever
-Family is one of the greatest gifts in life
-Africa is a part of who I am
-The feeling of being right where I am supposed to be is one of the greatest feelings ever
-Roses…and lots of them…really make me smile
-Hearing the question, “Will you Marry Me?” from the most wonderful man alive is something I will never forget
-Seeing and Hearing The Lord in so many ways has once again changed me forever

I could go on and on. There seems to be a never ending list in my head that unravels scroll upon scroll of memories, lessons, and blessings.

The Lord has answered so many of my prayers this year. Some were the kind that were softly spoken as I drifted off to sleep. Some were about simple things. Some were those things heavy on my heart. Some where prayers that had been uttered, whispered, and even pleaded for in the years that led up to this one. Some were through tears as my knees hit the floor with my head bowed. Answered. Every one of them was answered. Some didn’t get answered the way I had hoped for. Some were answered in such a magnificent way, I hadn’t even imagined of asking for. However, all of them were heard, and all of them were answered in a way that was better than I knew to request.

My year end review is that I think this was the best year of my life ever. It went by fast though, just as time is known to do. Maybe time really does fly by when you are having fun. God is good.

Merry Christmas!!

Walking the Path Before Us

In one 5th grade class in Rock Island, the students were given an assignment. What was it? It was an assignment to write about the person they thought was the “nicest person” they have met. Would you believe that one of those students wrote about me? Crazy, I know!

The cool thing, and the reason I am blogging about it, is that one morning I was feeling a bit down. You know those days where you are just feeling like everything you touch falls apart, and you just can’t do anything right? That was the morning I got a call from a precious, soft spoken, sweet voiced, 5th grader named Taylor.

I have spoken at Taylor’s school a few times about mission work and orphan ministry. As I listened to her on the phone that day, I realized something. God knew I was going to have a bad day in the days that led up to that phone call. Did he prompt her to write about me because he knew I would need to hear that just days later? Maybe so!

He works in amazing ways and this just reminding me that He really does walk our path before us. He sees what is coming and sets it up to care for us long before we get there. Taylor’s paper brought such a smile to my face that day. The reminder that God is always taking care of things on the road before we get there, completely warmed my heart on that cold winter day.

Who Do You Worship?

I just received a computer program that organizes my finances. It has a feature in which you categorize each check you write. That way, at any given time, you can tell where you are spending the most of your money. I’ll admit, I was reluctant to install it at first. I was afraid what I might see.

My fiancé and I were just talking recently about finances and money. We were talking about how as a society, it really is so easy to get wrapped up into “things”. Phil said just that day a speaker he heard made a statement such as, “I have more things in my kitchen than many people will own in their life.” I think most of us would qualify as being able to say that statement truthfully as well. The picture above is one of a typical home in the slums of Kenya. This puts things into perspective for me.

Billy Graham once said, “A Checkbook is a theological document, it will tell you who and what you worship.”

Take a look at your checkbook today. Is it telling you who or what you worship? Something to think about.

WWJD?

With the Christmas holiday approaching, we are all trying to figure out when to have celebrations, dinners, parties, etc. There are many decisions to be made. What kind of food will be served? Which social circles and family members will be invited to each gathering? Christmas is special, and time where we all tend to spend with those closest to us.

It is the most celebrated holiday of the year. The birth of Jesus is a pretty big event to be celebrating! Each year, my family has Christmas Eve dinner and then goes to our church’s candlelight service. I really enjoy the service. It is a time where I reflect how blessed I am and am filled with thankfulness.

However, each year Christmas Eve, more than any day of the year, is the hardest for me. I am a bundle of mixed emotions. I find myself standing in the candlelight overwhelmed with thanksgiving for the gift of the Savior’s birth and all the blessings I have been given that year. There is also an overwhelming weight on my shoulders as well though. I can’t stop thinking about all the children I have met that are in orphanages. There are so many. Their faces flash before me. They are alone…cold…and sad. It feels like a knife in the heart.

Why am I here and they are there? Why do I get the blessing of a warm home and loving family and they don’t? Why do I stand and celebrate with a full stomach and gifts under the tree? They have nothing. As I light my candle this year, I will do it in honor of all those blessings I have received: Good Health, Provision, Family, Friends, loved ones, and salvation. I will also light it in honor of and in prayer for those precious children who sit and wait all year for a family. Those ones who on Christmas morning will be looking out a frosty window pain longing for a loving mother to wrap their arms around them so tightly the love just pours from her heart to theirs. That is what they want for Christmas. Instead, they will wake up on Christmas morning and realize it’s just another ordinary day. A day of waiting, dreaming, and begging for food.

What will they do at Christmas? What will the least of these in our own backyard do? What would Jesus do?

In Luke (14 12-14) we are told that Jesus said, “When you give a luncheon or dinner, do not invite your friends, your brothers or relatives, or your rich neighbors; if you do, they may invite you back and so you will be repaid. But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed. Although they cannot repay you, you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous."

I have found this to be very convicting when it comes to our celebrations for the holidays. Let’s face it, how often do any of us invite the least of these to our sacred celebrations. We ARE celebrating the birth of Christ, right? Who else do you think He would want us to celebrate with? He DID tell us when we care for the least of these, we are caring for Him. So why just invite our friends and family to our celebrations?? He came here to show us how to live, how to love, and how to get to heaven. What better way to honor Him on his birthday than to celebrate with those closest to His heart..the least of these.

After learning of the large population of African Refugees in the Quad City area, we decided to invite a Refugee family to our Christmas Eve celebration. These refugees, many who came here with only the clothes on their backs, have been through so much. They are so thankful to be here and to be safe. They have so little and are in such need for basic things. One young man from the Congo told me that he is so thankful to be here because when he walks down the street, he no longer fears being shot to death. Some have watched their entire villages and families be shot and killed in tribal violence. One woman came here with bullets embedded in her legs from running from the rebel attackers. Instead of complaining, they give thanks for just being here and being alive.

And to think, some have nowhere to go for Christmas. Some have no food in the cupboards to feed their families. They are here, and are in need of family…brothers and sisters in Christ. So, my family is going to do something a little different this year. We are inviting one of those families into our home to celebrate together. I encourage you to do the same. If you are interested, let me know and I can get you some information. If you aren’t from the QC area, I encourage you to do something similar wherever you live. Maybe you have a neighbor who will be alone at Christmas. Maybe you know of a family in your community that could use a little light in their world this holiday. I encourage you to re-read that verse above. Pray about it and see how the Lord prompts you to respond. Try something new this year, and do exactly what He tells us to do in the message found in Luke.

Try it, enjoy, and let me know how it goes.

What Will Your Answer Be?

Cowardice asks the question, “Is it safe?” Expedience asks the question, “Is it popular?” But conscience asks the question, “Is it right?” And there comes a time when one must take a position, neither safe nor popular, but one must take it because it is right. -Martin Luther King


Have you ever been in one of those situations? Having a gut feeling about what you should do, but feeling the pressure of giving in because it isn’t the popular or safest thing to do? It’s not an easy place to be in life. We have probably all been there. Maybe you didn’t take that certain job offer because you didn’t think they offered you enough money. You thought it wouldn’t be safe for your financial well-being. Maybe you felt like you should serve in missions overseas, but didn’t think it was safe to fly over the ocean. Maybe you laughed a racist joke at work because not laughing would have been unpopular. Maybe you picked a career that was acceptable to others instead of doing what you felt called to.

Doing what’s right can be a difficult place to be in. It can be uncomfortable, awkward, and even feel lonely at times. Thinking back, I realize, I have never regretted going with the gut feeling He has given me about things. I can also recall times I was a coward or did what was popular and chickened out when it came to listening to my conscience. Then there are those times, when we just don’t know what direction to go in. Maybe the fog is so thick you can’t even see what direction is the right way to go.


I believe intuition is a gift from God, and I believe that is one way He speaks to us. He tells us what is right and many times speaks to our souls to give us guidance. He speaks to us in many ways. He speaks to us through others. He speaks through His word. He speaks through dreams and visions. He speaks to us while we pray. Amazing isn’t it? The catch is…we have to be listening. We have to be watching. We have to be reading His word. Sometimes we have to ask for it…and yes, we have to be praying.

Brace yourself. A Loaded question is about to come…..

What is your purpose in life?

(I’m going to ask that question again, because someone reading this right now needs to hear it again.)

What is your purpose in life?

Have you thought about that? Why were you put here? Are you living your life to the potential the Lord has for you? Are you fulfilling your purpose in this life on earth? Are you doing what He placed you here to do? If the answer is no or you aren’t sure..go back up to the quote above. Are those obstacles standing in your way?

We all have a purpose here. We do. That part is simple. However, finding that purpose can be a bit more tricky. Know this…The Lord is standing by ready to show you. He is waiting for you to ask. He is waiting for you to go for it and to see how amazing life can be once you find it. Listen and watch for Him. He has amazing and extraordinary things for us ordinary people to do and will even give you all the skills to do them. Are you willing to say yes? Are you willing to do what is right? He won’t let you down. He is in control, has your best interest at heart, and stands waiting for you to respond. Will you say yes or will you say no? What will your answer be?


There is no time for ease and comfort. It is time to dare and endure. -Winston Churchill

Sojourn

While away for the Thanksgiving holiday, I was told of a tragedy that happened just down the street from where I live. A woman was shot by her husband just before he turned the gun on himself and committed suicide. Her lifeless body was found in a pool of her own blood. “Shot? What do you mean? Did she die?” I asked. The very breath in my lungs was robbed as the answer echoed through the phone and into my ear. “Yes, she died.” This news was shocking. What came next stopped me in my tracks. The murder victim…I knew her.

Her name was Dana. I didn’t know her well, but did know of her. I went to high school with her. She is gone now. Dead. Her temporary life here on earth is now over. As I think of her now, I see her smiling. It’s the familiar memory that plays in my mind of her. That smile is comforting. However, there is a sadness there as well. It may seem strange, but I mourn the loss of someone I hardly knew. My mind is consumed as to if she knew about the gift of Salvation.

A few days after receiving the news of this woman’s death. I learned of another seemingly untimely death. This one was that of a child. Eugine Wandera, at the tender age of 14, is dead. The small city of Busia, Kenya, suffered a great loss this week. This child, took his last breath just a few short days ago. He drowned while swimming in the Sio river. Two young boys out for a swim. One walked back home, the other came back in a coffin.

Eugine’s death broke my heart. Life. It is so short. It is here one second, and gone the next. As an orphan, what had he endured in life? It seemed so unfair. Who would purchase his coffin? Who would mourn this loss? I couldn’t shake the thought of how he never had the chance to live the life he deserved. Life as an orphan is tough. It’s unfair, and it nothing short of breaks my heart. There are so many just like him out there. They wait. They wait for a life most only dream of. A life with a forever family.

As always, I have questions. How many missed opportunities to be used in sharing the ultimate Gift, will be complied in my earthly sojourn. How many children will die today..children that you or I could have sponsored, adopted, prayed for, or whispered “Jesus Loves You” in their ear? Why is it so easy for us to look to the Lord with a perplexed and sometimes even angry expression as if to second guess or question His plan in things? He tells us to go out and spread the Good News. Yet, we don’t. When will we learn?

I remember not many years ago while in college, a young man committed suicide just a hundred yards from me. I was held in the building for hours before he pulled the trigger. I was trapped there. Told that I couldn’t leave because a gunman was in the parking lot. There were many of us. We were told to not walk by the windows and to remain low. Scared at first, but after hours past, we began to think about other things. About the time I was complaining to someone about my weekend plans. *Pop* Just like that. In an instant, he was dead. That moment changed my life. I realized then more than ever, how precious life was. That surreal moment was embodied with me superficially complaining about life, while a man so close by decided life wasn’t worth living anymore and ended his. I remember seeing his mother fall to her knees as the policeman told her that her son was dead. Something in me changed in that moment. Life never seemed so short.

Our sojourn. It’s packed full of opportunities to serve Him and to do it well. We don’t know how much time we have, so we best live life doing as much as possible right now. Reach out. Take a step. Share Christ’s love. Do it now. Do it tomorrow. Do it often. Make the difference in the life of someone else. Reach out your hand and just do it. Do something…do anything…time is short.

Passion

Recently, I have been asked the questions, “What is it that you like to do?” and “What is it that you are passionate about?” Seems like an easy question, right? Seems like something easy to respond to. For some reason I have not been able to answer that question in the simple, clear, or concise way I was once able to years ago.

When you ask most people that question, “What is it in life that you like to do,” you most likely get answers that are similar to the following: I like to play tennis. I like to sew, I love skiing. I like to paint. I love to travel, etc. Those “It” things are the passions in that person’s life. Those are the things (besides the general answers of spending time with family, etc) that if they had to pick one thing they personally enjoy doing most, that is “It.”

My amazingly talented and athletic fiancé has a love for the outdoors. He reintroduced me to an old friend of mine from childhood….the bike. Phil isn’t just good at cycling. He is REALLY good. Me, on the other hand..well, let’s just say that the bicycle helmet was invented for people like me. I enjoy riding with him, and I appreciate the joy he has for it. We recently went for a short hike through the woods. I think I could really get into hiking. I liked it. It was fun, and I really enjoyed my time with him doing it and sharing those moments with him. It has been good for me to do these things because I have somehow, the past few years drifted away from being outdoors and enjoying what it has to offer.

There are lots of things I enjoy doing. However, they just don’t seem like the fitting answer to that question about what I am personally truley passionate about. There was a time in my life, not so long ago, that I was a different person. Sadly enough, I wasn’t exactly “getting it” when it came to a few things in my relationship with the Lord. I was a Christian then. However, I wasn’t living life in a way that was encompassed by the Lord’s will. Back then, I would have answered the question above much differently than I am about to attempt now.

I remember the moment so clearly. I was standing in the midst of poor in Romania. They were all around me sobbing. Some crying out for joy and thankfulness to the Lord (even though they had so little by society’s standards). Some were crying out in desperation and pain. Although they seemed to have nothing, they had so much. They were “getting it” more than I was in life. I stood amongst them as if hit by a truck. It was then the Lord hit me and hit me hard. I suddenly “Got It” and had a silent and very intimate moment with the Lord. Up until that point, I was living my life for me and asking for His help and wisdom along the way. In that moment, He revealed to me the importance of living life for HIM. It was there in that little church in the Gypsy village that I felt Him and made a promise to live my life for Him instead of for me.

From that point forward, my passion in life has been to serve Him. The joy and blessings that have been bestowed upon me are not worthy of words to describe. I cannot explain the pure joy I feel when I am intentionally and actively serving Him. The taste of it is sweeter than any other I have had. The feeling was once something I heard people talk about but never knew what it felt like to be a part of. The feeling of being in His will and serving Him while feeling His presence, is one that cannot be replicated. It’s something that once you get a true taste of it, you can’t help but want more and more.

A passion for serving, helping those in need, caring for an orphan child, lending a hand to one of the least of these in different capacities. I suppose to many, it seems strange to have this as a passion. However, that is my answer. My passion is actively serving the Lord. There are many things I enjoy doing in life, but none even come close enough to compare. I long to base my life around it.

We know that in the Bible, when Moses saw the glory of the Lord, he was changed. He was changed so much so that his physical appearance changed. I used to often speak to others in presentations and messages about this transformation and was reminded of it recently in a message at church. When someone gets that close to Him, they change… period. I saw the Lord that morning in the small church in Romania. He met me there, and I was changed.

I enjoy many things in life. However, what is “IT” that I enjoy doing most in life? Serving Him. What is my favorite thing to do? Serve Him. This revelation didn’t come to me just by being raised in or attending church. It didn’t come to me by occasionally volunteering time and talents or giving to worthy causes. It didn’t even come to me by way of being a Christian. It came to me when I was seeking. It came to me when I was longing to see Him. It came to me when I said yes to serving and got up and did it. That passion is intense and I only taste it when I am actively serving. Hard to explain, but it is amazing. I find that my answer isn’t the most popular response to the posed question at times. It isn’t the answer that all understand, are looking for, can relate to, or are expecting. Maybe that is why I seem to have a hard time explaining it or answering. However, it is what it is, and I pray that I never lose it. Of all the things He has given to us to enjoy, to savor, to appreciate, and to love doing….that is my personal “IT.” Servanthood.


Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms. If anyone serves, he should do it with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To Him be the glory and the power forever and ever. Peter 4:10-11